Why The Nigerian Gay Marriage Bill Is Unimportant

I never considered gay marriage to be an issue. It first came to my attention when the gay-bill was suggested to Nigeria’s law makers. It caused quite a debacle, and instead the anti-gay bill was passed in 2013.

I remember thinking: Why is this an issue?

Everyone condemned the passage of the gay bill. But, I did not see the need for the bill in the first place. And, i still don’t.

If there is one good thing the bill did, its the awareness it brought to majority of Nigerians that there are gay people in our midst. It just never occurred to me that these gay people wanted to get married. Perhaps i had not had the honor of meeting enough gay people.

But, can you blame me?

A statement by PDP spokesman – Femi Fani Kayode – caught my attention today. In his usual tone, he wore his crown of political self-righteousness and pointed out just another reason why APC as a party isn’t suitable to lead Nigerians – especially not with Buhari as its Presidential aspirant.

Buhari and Kayode
Buhari and Kayode

He summed up his point in the end of a rather otherwise nice speech saying:

[…] General Muhammadu Buhari, in response to a request from some western countries, is considering scrapping the anti-gay laws in our country and pushing through legislation that would allow same sex marriage.

“We are far more interested in that than in the King of Morocco because if it is true that that is what they are planning, it would be a reflection of their moral depravity as a party and it would be a negation of our values as a God-fearing nation.”

I have always known the meaning of moral. But, to make sure i understand it as people often use it in this context, i go over to check it’s meaning again to ensure I am not missing something.

Here is what vocabulary.com says:

concerned with principles of right and wrong or conforming to standards of behavior and character based on those principles.

It goes on to say:

Moral comes from the Latin word mores, for habits. The moral of a story is supposed to teach you how to be a better person. If moral is used as an adjective, it means good, or ethical. If you have a strong moral character, you are a good member of society. If someone is a cheat and a liar, you might say, “She is not a moral person.”

Keywords i pick from this meaning are principles, good and ethical.

The last bit also catches my eye; to be a moral person requires i do not cheat or lie.

Then, I would be right to say it is my moral obligation to tell the truth about my sexuality. It is hinged on the principle of honesty. And, there is goodness in its truthful simplicity. It is simple to tell the truth. But, an environment like ours makes it difficult and complicated. Would you agree?

The bottom line of the matter is that right and wrong isn’t something you spell out from the written laws of man. It’s easy for him to be influenced by his belief system. Regardless of whether that system were intact or corrupt beyond repair.

How would you consider the gay issue? Like many, you may have the it-is-a-choice mentality as regards to it. This is worth addressing.

I see no reason why I should choose to suffer. To carry the burden thrown upon me for being gay. All I know is I have to carry it if i am to live a life that is true. I often joke to my friends that if i had a button to switch it off, i would have done so when i turned 16.

Though, its different now.

I have come to accept that everything happens for a reason, I have come to know that there are certain things you can’t control, I have come to understand that i need all of me to be able to function as a human being. For these, I am grateful. I would not change a thing. Being gay has taught me compassion (i just found out that that’s the meaning of my name).

I never aspired for marriage in my childhood and teenage years. I am beginning to find the idea of being married to a man is a bit appealing. But, I still scuff at the idea.

What would marriage do to the union of love i already share with my significant other? Perhaps, it would make me believe i share a similar lifestyle with my straight friends, or it would ensure it made my boyfriend say until death do us part. I still haven’t found a reason to buy into the idea of gay marriage in Nigeria. It shouldn’t have been made into an issue in the first place.

Some would argue that its all about equal rights. I retort with: how many basic things have been provided for you in Nigeria?

Gay marriage is an issue now. It must be addressed. A significant number of Nigerian people – including gay people – do not get the concept of someone being gay. Rubbing a gay marriage bill on their faces may not be a the wisest thing to do. It’s more important that we educate ourselves first and understand things before we pass laws. A straight bus conductor isn’t thinking about two men in love when he hears gay bill. He is thinking of two men fucking. He is bound to act in accordance to what he thinks that means to him.

Again, the anti-gay bill has done a good job in creating awareness. An opportunity for us to sit down and talk

Politicians can wear their crown and dramatize all the want. But, at the end of the day, we know they will do whatever it takes to further their cause. Whether that cause is deprived of humanity or depraved of morality. It’s left for the rest of us who might have just enough sagacity to do what’s good.

Enjoy my Blog.

You are Awesome.

3 thoughts on “Why The Nigerian Gay Marriage Bill Is Unimportant

Add yours

  1. Nigeria and Nigerians have always been known to have misplaced priorities,with all of d security issues we have in this country, they still find time to condemn pple for love. I don’t blame Nigerians though, they act on what they hear rather than what they actually knw…I hope it gets better for d sake of d unborn generation!

    You are awesome!


    1. We really need problem solvers to solve things. I was recently in a workshop where a prominent lady sed: if you were trained in a Nigerian University, you have NOT been educated.

      I would agree with her. But, i would replace “educated” with “properly educated”

      Education is fundamental in eradicating the insidious superstition that prevails.

      We are the ones to make Nigeria better. It’s unkind we have to work twice as hard to get ourselves to “properly educated” status. But, you have to keep in mind that thriving is the only option.


  2. Too much hate is being directed at something we don’t understand. I wish all that energy would be channelled towards solving the real problems of this country.


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